The Change....!

In a misty morning
Before the ray of the sun
with the climax of your dream
you open your eyes to see
nothing has changed

In a cloudy day
While running down the street
having school bag on your back
and you come back home to see
nothing has changed

In a rainy day
When you get drenched
on the top of a hill
and you come back home to see
nothing has changed

In a summer afternoon
while boiling with your own sweat
you burn barefooted
on a basking road
and you come back home to see
nothing has changed

In a drop dead dark
While you have no light
you find your way out
in the defth of the night
and you come back home to see
nothing has changed

And times comes when
you rise over himalayas
like the mighty monsoon
You shine over ocean
like the gorgeous moon

You dont care if
it is basking day
or a drop dead night
All you care to do
You come back home to see
every thing have changed.

When I saw this girl........!

A Journey to remember .......A memory to cherish….
Location: Bangalore (Majestic Bus Terminal)
Time: 2006 (Monsoons) 7:30 Evening

After waiting for almost half an hour, finally my bus Number 21c came towards the platform. The whole pile of humanity, which got accumulated on platform number 19a, rushed to grab a seat. I was lucky enough to grab one and luckier to capture another. It was not because I was strong. It was because I made my way through two fat guys. Thanks to my slim and trim stunning figure. As soon I got into the bus, I took a seat and kept my bag on another adjacent to it towards the window.

I waved to a girl who was standing with much difficulty in the crowd and gave her a friendly smile. I offered her a seat next to me. She was confused but she took the seat. Getting confused was not a priority for her I guess. After settling down she asked me.

She: Excuse me!!! Do I know you by any chance?

Me: Of course Not (with a poise)

She: Then why did you saved this seat for me?( She looked puzzled)

Me: Well ….ah……hmmm…..yesss … may be I don’t like to see some beautiful girl travelling in such crowded bus while standing uncomfortably….(Flirting smile…oh I am in expert in that)

She: (Shocked, surprised, confused but happy for the reason “she got a seat”, and for the better Reason “She was mentioned as beautiful”

She: Oh I see. But don’t expect thanks from me. I never asked for this seat….

Me: As you wish (Wow I love that attitude …)

And I started looking out of window as if I don't give it a damn if she is beside me well!!! Yes….. of course I was thinking about her..like a desperate high school lover.

After passing of a couple of kilometers. She got another battery of question for me.

She: By the way…where are you going?

Me: Rajarajeshwari Nagar. I guess this bus goes there only. I was trying to be over smart….

She: I know (Annoyingly) but it passes through a lot of places also.

Me: No answer (I was clean bowled….)

She: Where exactly in RR Nagar. (With a blink revealing her beautiful and shiny eyes.)

Me: Market Complex

She: Are you from RNSIT or JSS Engineering College….(She said in a fashion that she likes ppl for that college)

Me: Yes I am from RNSIT. ( How does she knows that? May be she is watching me going to college on my noisy Yamaha R100…..Bingo)

She: See I am totally confused by your act. Even though it is pleasant but I am not comfortable.

Me: (with a heavy heart) If you mind sitting beside me, you can very well leave the seat and the other rusty and dusty guy staring at you (and moreover on me) can take it.

She: See I am confused. I was right there in front of you at majestic and you never gave an eye to me. And now you save a seat from the whole crowd Just because I am beautiful. I don’t believe in your reasoning. Tell me why did you saved this seat for me?

Me: (to myself) Oh god…I am in serious trouble now. She don’t believe in the straight forward and true reason and now she want a reason so that she can brand me as ‘’Good Boy”.

Boy, I must tell you. Girls always try to find a reason if they happens to talk with you. I mean somehow they got to prove you a good boy so that you cannot take them for granted…….I never understood this strange behavior.

She: Hey I am asking you why you don’t answer my question. (Such that she is waking me up from deep thought)

Me: (Recovering). Ok that is because…… I saw you waiting for this bus for long time even before most of the people came for it. And you were unable to grab a seat when people madly rushed as soon as the bus arrived. People coming after you got a seat and you did not. I thought to give it a justice and saved it. (Well done Nishu!! That was a good shot)

She: Oh thanks a lot….by the way you noticed me ha? (Now she was being flirty)

Me: (to myself) I don’t want this ‘thanks’ tied with one of the most difficult question to answer.

If I say that” I noticed her” she may mistake me for a stalker and if I say “I did not” then she will think that I am a liar to tell her that she is beautiful. God I am gone

She: Hey

Me: Ya!!!! Well I don’t know (Girls love to see guys confused…in this case her love for confusion saved me)

She: Ok tell me your name

Me: (Oh god! What she is going to do with my name). Well I am Nish…….

She: Nish…Nish what….Nish….aaa, Nish…ant or Nish….uuuuuu..(Boy I tell you, She was superfast and supersmart to say that)

Me: Now you have three choices you can call me any one…..(Ha ha ha ha….Grabed the chance…..)

She: She smiled..(Oh l love those lethal smiles….they kill me instantly… ).

Me: By the way I am Nishant Officially and Nishu Lovingly.

She: O!!!! Good way to introduce yourself with a girl..

Me: Oh really thanks a lot.

She: But I must tell you you are missing something

Me: Missing something….and what exactly?

She: You didn’t ask for my Name…

Me: (to myself..who cares….)oh….well what is your good name miss…? ( I hope she is Miss…)

She: Hi I am Suhasini…..

Me: Luvly name Suhasini…..Perhaps luvlier then you…I smiled (and that was a genuine smile)

She: Oh thanks a lot…but was that a complement? (With frowning eyes…)

Me: Can you please tell me one thing? (Perhaps this was the first question I asked her…asking for her name was something she forced me to do.

She: Ya

Me: How did you figure out, that I am from any one of those two colleges?

She: It is simple..you are not a localite …….are you..? And that’s the reason for you to be someone from one of those colleges.

Me: Good …You are intelligent also….(with a pinch of sarcasm)

She frowned with a smile and I appreciated that by nodding my head.

By this time we were about the reach Utharahalli Bus stop.…….
to be cont......

Kaancha.....!!!

The smoke from my cigar made a way to the mist and the cool breeze made the mist to dilute. There was something which was not diluting....it was mesmerizing sound of the flute. Further I was driving....more the sound was flowing down to my heart through the ears....and next moment I was on the top of the hill. And there I saw him. Small but beautiful blue eyes.....fair complexion with pale shade....nose like a chewing gum with undefined shape. Short hair small height. He was just walking around and playing with the pure air of the hills. Kids down the plane can never feel the freshness which this little boy does. The memory is still fresh as those winds...I was then a trainee engineer for a hydel power project posted on the hills to the far eastern side of the country. Terrains still un-explored, air still fresh, hills still young, rain still soothing, people still welcoming.

"Khana khaisa amma....?" I asked the land lady and smiled. She happens to be one of the sweetest old women on this earth. I went inside the room. It was a cozy room. The roof was made of bamboo with husk on top of it. I could clearly see it was getting moistened in the morning mist. One of those dew drops made me to wake up and once again the first thing I could hear was those mesmerizing flute, it was so magnetic that it could teleport me to the other part of the universe instantly.

I drove my vintage 2nd world war willy to the top of the same hill and found that child again. He was sitting on the same stone overlooking the valley to the horizon at the other side. I felt as if he was waiting for an angel to come and caress him. I wanted to talk to him, but I could not, language divide stopped me to do so. I just kept my hand on his shoulder and offered him the chocolate which I got from Calcutta. Initially he was hesitant to accept it but when I looked into his eyes he took it with a grace.

Today he is coming to see me. I am so happy. A commanding officer of the gorkhas is coming to see me. May be the stars on his shoulder will not impress me the way his small blue eyes did to me. The olive green uniform may not make me feel that pale skin effect. For me he is still a young boy from the Far East. Untouched by any complication of this cruel world. His short & smart hair, a flute in his left hand could make me feel happier.

Halka Halka Sa Ye Nasha....

She was beautiful…and she made me feel beautiful instantly….the effect was same as that of a cup of tea ……rrrrefreshing. Red and brown shades of life faded to purple and then to romantic pink.
Interesting Fact – I don’t know her name…
More Interesting Fact – I don’t want to know it either…
Just one glimpse of her face was enough for keeping me going happy, happier and happiest……
I tried and related her with every nook and corner of my life…
I woke up late…and tried to imagine her sweet reaction to it….oh my god…she is not happy to see me getting up late… (She is happy that she got chance to say something to me )
She must have loved to listen …when I sung like a maniac……I am talking about my bathroom singing habits.
Oh…she got crazy to see me eating my breakfast (very fast without any break…)….oh she must hated me for that (Sweetheart has no idea…I always get late for office….)
Look she always admires me, when I shower love to those cute little kids…. (She is a typical women …;)). I am more than sure that she will love my idea for having hundreds of children and thousands of grandchildren
Does she likes…my taste of music….obviously…she likes me so she will like them also…. (God knows why…. ).
Does she disagrees with my understanding for politics….(Yes my dear friends she is so innocent to do so.. )
Does she love the vividity of different Indian culture…..yes she do…. (..I love it coz she has genuine respect for all of them…). Hope she will help one of them to be preserved….
Should I express my views for feminism to her…..? (Nah…she can misunderstand me for a Good boy..I hate to be called one.)
Hey wait… If I can express my idea of education to her…I know she will not mistake me for a rebel… (Wow)
I wish….If she can cook all the delicacies for me (I am crazy for food…though I don’t look like. )
I hope that she will sing a melody to calm me down…. (Common Nishu…she is not Lata Mangeshkar)
I can’t resist to ask her for a joy ride in the middle of the night…Just for a cup of coffee 70 Km away on the highway (My old jeep will suck 10 liters of fuel just for a cup of coffee ).
I will love it if she doesn’t mind to do salsa…on the grass floor…under the monsoon rain (Of course with me ….)
Do I really want them to happen in my life? I don’t care if I want or not. Only thing is I know is that, I love these feelings and desires popping into my heart …and want to stir them with every song I hum.

Random Thoughts....

I may call it transition in my outlook. Things are changing everyday and some are getting good and a few are getting very good. Contrarily many things are getting bad, worse worst. Life is going like a long train journey, one we have with Great Indian Railways (Truly Great).You wait for another railway station rather than milestones. I may be at the mid of my journey or may be I have finished only a quarter. Well may be I am about to conclude it…only God know that. But all those thoughts become irrelevant, once you start looking outside the window. You find greenery well amalgamated with different good and bad colors of life. Wait a minute! Am I making sense …may be …..may not be. Who cares? At least not I. The other day while flipping the newsprints, I got some shocks…not shockwaves anyways.The separatism, regionalism, murder, rape …blah blah. Today It was finance which caught my eyes. Finance, I never understood them, or I never understood the financers of our country. Within a short period of 1 year things are getting ugly. There is something seriously wrong with me or the media…can’t write much on that, have to study economics to figure out. An array of thoughts starts doing ping pong and its is really difficult to get a nap without holding them. These things sometimes drive me crazy and some times numb. I am not comfortable either ways. It always ends up with kicking me down to ashes. I don’t know if I can be phoenix but I have to fly again…err…to much of over ambitions with greek mythocurry. Hate it to recite or to speak out but can’t help it all the time. World is not static, it is rotating and to make me amused enough it is revolving also. They say we get a free trip around the sun. Around the Sun? Why not “towards the Sun” instead. May be sun is too expensive to go….no the reason is, it is hot…..( Not like those Hollywood Babes) …it is real hot….red hot. Interesting, something giving out light and life is not cool at all. It is burning in itself. Something which strikes the chord is that, sun while giving out light and life is not cool enough to get near to. Is it sad? Not necessary. What if the sun will be cool? May be visiting over there for a summer vacation. Ishhh…again another idiotic thought…this is how my life goes on…one foolishness followed by another and whole bundle of crazy things to be done before it is too late to realize the mistake. And then starts the lessons and passion to improve. It goes useless…well not every time. I get improved day by day. At least by mistakes if not by lessons. You click your mouse button and the whole world gets pasted on to your retina walls. Not necessarily, you need to get some other organ to accommodate them. It is called heart. Well most of youngsters like us happen to give to some good looking girl and sometimes to many of them to share and play with it. Oh my god once again the bizarre ideas are ruining my time….but some wise men say this is how some great discoveries were made, I mean by thinking bizarre…mind it only some of them were made not all of them. Our mind craves for something called perfect and there is nothing called perfect. Same thing is with heart. It strives for something called peace. But no one knows if it exist…peace or so called peace, it exist only in the high level diplomatic talks of bureaucrats’. Philosophical…or .ah…I don’t want to give that crap. But my fingers don’t obey me and they keep pressing some stupid keys. School children amuse me the most. They fear their teacher more than a devil. For them Dracula is just a character not a reality …and if a few of them believe in it, they make a difference. Homework is something gives them nausea not the probable nuclear world war. Our mind reacts in the same manner every time, though with the different situation at different stages of age. The agony and panic makes the same effect. Am I speaking something like Rocket Science? And what is the fuss about this rocket science. Why people everywhere gives an example of it when they have to mention something complicated technological scientific and etc etc ……I find it a bundle of mechanics some Gentlemen called Newton told us long back. Enough of all these crap. It is time to have a coffee break. Adieu .

Midnight Maggies....

Good morning….and then….. My dear it is already afternoon (I don’t remember who said that.) Oh my god! (With exaggerated exclamation)…My Passport application, my Driving license and all…oh no not again…another day is lost …Mummieeee (Seriously I wish she should not hear that)…….and life returns to ever lazy pace….

For all those uncounted missed classes…and many more so called important and actually important lost things. Who was responsible? Well it’s a difficult question to answer…reason no1 I don’t want to blame other people and reason no2. I don’t like to blame myself either. So finally I have to blame my favorite….Midnight Maggy. Oh those noodles drives me crazy every time served hot and crazier when I have to cook them.. Please imagine about the situation yourself (coz I am poor in writing screenplay ) Late Night…atmosphere.. (With periodical roaring of call center cabs) Background Music- ( You can imagine every genre of music here) Some 2-3 guys…discussing important issues like economics, politics, hollywood, bollywood (and sometimes kollywood ) cricket , Rock and Roll , Bangalore and of course with the centre of focus were the girls from our college and better girls from other college ( exam , courses and careers were excluded mandatorily, even though those were the nights before some big shot examinations). It forms a perfect niche of a talk show where each one among us used to be an expert in our own fields. (Guess my field of expertise…very good! you are right) And suddenly those prolonged discussion prompts some twists in our stomach… . No mom can come in the middle of the night to rescue our ever hungry bellies so Chief cook err…or Chief Chef Nishu gets ready with all his might and heads towards the kitchen ( which is absolutely in mess ).…for his notorious Experimental Cooking. Challenge one –who is going wash those dishes???? This immortal question get answered with arguments and blame games, finally we settle for a joint operation. Challenge two- Who is going to be the tester- Now here, no one is going to compromise and I had to take that role without any emergency and life saving faculties available at that great hour or midnight. Our experimental cooking generally came out with disasters for our collective appetite , but we were lucky once to come with a recipe of cooking maggy with onion tomato and chicken masala. (Yummiee…… ).Some times Bachcha ( or Shaitan Bachca alias Anshul ) proposed for getting a patient for that recipe.. He always made sensible proposals as far as business is concerned. But what business does a band of carefree (or careless) boys can do? And the answer is talking, talking and more talking . God knows from where we got those talketive women kind of spirits inside us With hot and sizzling Maggy smelling deliciously we used to rush for our balcony hoping for getting the glimpse of any hot shot babe even in the middle of night.(hope is a crazy thing) . Thanks to Mrinal and his volunteering for preparing tea without any argument. Mrinal you are great and I mean it …The Challenges for preparing tea is the same. You were kind enough to do it with absolutely no idea for whereabouts of the ingredients. Maggy Noodles- It takes just two minutes to cook them. Maggy Noodles- It takes another 2 hours to finish it with those sensible discussions about Feminism and Sensex. Well my dear readers by the time we used to finish those intertwined noodles and got exhausted with our never ending discussion…it used to be a beautiful early morning… Hope you got the answer. Those Midnight Maggies were the real culprit for another lost day of our life.

Andaaze Bayaan....

Subaha ke osh ne jab suraj ke kirno ko khud main sameta
to boond boond aapke aankhon ki chamak ban gayi

aaise hi kohre ki chadar odhe jab aap ne kadam rakha
to baago ki har kali har fool aapke zism ki mehak ban gayi

aapki maujudgi ka jadu in fizaon ko badal deti hai
aapki maujudgi ka khayal vi kuch aaisa hi asar deti hai

armaano ke is anjumann main aapko saja lene ki hasrat hoti hai
dil ko kavi ishq kavi muhobbahoti to kavi shararat ki chahat hoti hai

bekhayali ke is aalam me aap khayal ban kar chaa jate hain
aise khayalon me hi aapse milne ki kasak jawaan hoti hai.

Randon Thoughts.....

I may call it transition in my outlook. Things are changing everyday and some are getting good and a few are getting very good. Contrarily many things are getting bad, worse worst. Life is going like a long train journey, one we have with Great Indian Railways (Truly Great).You wait for another railway station rather than a milestones. I may be at the mid of my journey or may be I have finished only a quarter. Well may be I am about to conclude it…only God know that. But all those thoughts become irrelevant, once you start looking outside the window. You find greenery well amalgamated with different good and bad colors of life. Wait a minute! Am I making sense …may be …..may not be. Who cares. At least not I.

The other day while flipping the newsprints, I got some shocks…not shockwaves anyways.The separatism, regionalism, murder, rape …blah blah. Today It was finance which caught my eyes. Finance, I never understood them, or I never understood the financers of our country. With in a short period of 1 year things are getting ugly. There is something seriously wrong with me or the media…can’t write much on that, have to study economics to figure out. An array of thoughts starts doing ping pong and its is really difficult to get a nap without holding them.These things sometimes drives me crazy and some times numb. I am not comfortable either ways. It always ends up with kicking me down to ashes. I don’t know if I can be phoenix but I have to fly again…err…to much of over ambitions with greek mythocurry. Hate it to recite or to speak out but can’t help it all the time.

World is not static, it is rotating and to make me amused enough it is revolving also. They say we get a free trip around the sun. Around the Sun? Why not “towards the Sun” instead. May be sun is too expensive to go….no the reason is, it is hot…..( Not like those Hollywood Babes) …it is real hot….red hot. Interesting, something giving out light and life is not cool at all. It is burning in itself. Something which strikes the chord is that, sun while giving out light and life is not cool enough to get near to. Is it sad? Not necessary. What if the sun will be cool. May be visiting over there for a summer vacation. Ishhh…again another idiotic thought…this is how my life goes on…one foolishness followed by another and whole bundle of crazy things to be done before it is too late to realize the mistake. And then starts the lessons and passion to improve. It goes useless…well not every time. I get improved day by day. At least by mistakes if not by lessons.

You click your mouse button and the whole world get pasted on to your retina walls. Not necessarily, you need to get some other organ to accommodate them. It is called heart. Well most of youngsters like us happens to give to some good looking girl and sometimes to many of them to share and play with it. Oh my god once again the bizarre ideas are ruining my time….but some wise men say this is how some great discoveries were made, I mean by thinking bizzare…mind it only some of them were made not all of them. Our mind craves for something called perfect and there is nothing called perfect. Same thing is with heart. It strives for something called peace. But no one knows if it exist…peace or so called peace, it exist only in the high level diplomatic talks of bureaucrats’. Philosophical…or .ah…I don’t want to give that crap. But my fingers don’t obey me and they keep pressing some stupid keys.

School children amuse me the most. They fear their teacher more then a devil. For them Dracula is just a character not a reality …and if a few of them believe in it, they make a difference. Homework is something gives them a nausea not the probable nuclear world war. Our mind react in the same manner everytime, though with the different situation at different stages of age. The agony and panic makes the same effect. Am I speaking something like Rocket Science? And what is the fuss about this rocket science. Why people everywhere gives an example of it when they have to mention something complicated technological scientific and etc etc ……I find it a bundle of mechanics some Gentlemen called Newton told us long back. Enough of all these crap. It is time to have a coffee break.

Adieu

Andaaze Bayaan....( Aap)

Unki Nigaaho ke aaiene main jab dekha khudko
Zazbaat dil ke hoto se chalak gaye
Unki Zulfo ki chaaon main kuch aaise kho se gaye hum
Na fikr khud ki rahi na khabar zamaane ki
Har aahat par ab ye lagta hai is muhobbat main
Kyon nahi dete wo khabar aapne aane ki


Ye muhobbatn ka hai hai kasoor
Ya unki aankhon ki sararat
Unko paane ki chaahat main Hum Kar sakte hai is Dunia se khilafat
Magar parwaah to karte hai is hum bas is baat ki
Bayaan kare to kare kaise hum unse hum haalat apne zazbaat ki.


Wo bhi ek zamaana tha Jab hum aashiq hua karte the
Dil main lakho zazbaat liye unke aankhon se piya karte the
Aaj unke gam se ruswa hum Shaayar se ho gaye hai
Maikhaane main jaam aur tanhaayi main aanshu piya karte hai


Ab Ye Muhobbat to Is Umar ka Kasoor hai
Kam ho ya Jaada ,Ye sabko hoti Zaroor hai
Koi laakh chupaaye dunia se magar
Dil main ek kasak hoti Zaroor hai


Aapki aankhon ki hai inayaat jo dil aaj khusnaseeb hua jaata hai
Warna kaha hai ye baat is zaalim zamaane main jo koi kisi ko itna samagh paata hai
Kuch aur bhi bayaan karti hai aapki aakhein jise sirf hum dekh paate hai Mehsoos to karte hai magar aapko bata nahi paate hai.

Just Like That....

Some times I sit and try to imagine about world after my death. Will this earth be going around the same way it goes now. If there will be an infinite chain of days and nights. If the monsoon will pour during december and summer poping up in september. How our children will be doing it all. Will this world be more beautiful than it is now. May be or may not be. But one thing is for sure. I will be not there to help them out. This is how this world is going on. There is hand holding up to a certain time and then we all are set free to follow the way we have chosen for ourselves. The analogy lies with the support we provide to the beams or columns casted fresh and then it is removed. Anyways the cycle lies with we being supported followed by being supporting. If this is the go of life then what is the go of death?. What about the existance and what about so called emotions and feelings we carry with in ourselves. It may be perfectly fine that once our body is disposed we are gone out of world physically, but where does our thoughts and imaginations go. Do we really exist even if we dump our physical body. Religion and philosophy may be able to answer it. But how can we be sure or convinced. If i can see this world the same way other see. If yellow colour looks red to other but he too say that visible red to him yellow. If it is dark in day for some and bright at night and we still call that dark, bright from our eyes. Sorry people you may get mad about these thoughts of my but it bugs me every time. When i see some slum children across my office bus window and suddenly a merc passes by. How things can be so much diversed on the same plane ?. How can one born poor and another rich.. Things like this press out some feeling out of my trivial mind and then i get puzzled with the shower of questions. I don't know wether I am making sense out of my writing but i am writting just because if felt like writing.

Andaaze Bayaan ..(Irada)

Subaha ko jab Falak ke us paar dekha to khubsoorati aapka khayal ban kar dil main uter gayi
Shaam ki tanhaayion main bhi aapki yaad Chaand ki roushani main badal gayi
Ab to har aahat par aapke kadmo ka ehsaas hota hai
Zindagi ke har more par aapka saath paane ka dilaas hota hai
Rehna hai muskil aapke bina is dunia main akele ilm hai hame is ehsaas ka
Tabhi to is zaalim zamane se aapko haasil kar lene ka Ab har lamha iraada kuch khaas hota hai ….

A Little Flower...

The morninng mist kissed her and blessed her with grace. The golden sunrays reflectd the best of her colors . As the day progressed cool breeze caressed her and made her feel great . She was happy and the next moment she realized something and started sobbing.
A butterfly was flying near by and came after it heared her weeping.

Butterfly: Hey little creature! why are you crying my dear ?

Little Flower: I am sad because I have just realized that I will have to leave this beautiful world in a day or two.

Butterfly: Oh I see. But my dear you will be here only.

Little Flower: (Amazingly) How will I be here only?

Butterfly: Can you see those buds( It points to the flower buds), you will be here in this world in those buds

Little Flower: But how I is it possible?
Butterfly: We all will be here by our offsprings

Little Flower: Ok ok now I am getting it.

Butterfly: Yes our offsprings will carry our genes and we will be here forever

Little Flower: Thank you very much you kind butterfly. Now I feel happy again
and the Little Flower lived happily ever after